Tyler “Burnsy” “Technician” Burns is unapologetically himself, spreading body positivity and good vibes wherever he goes. A loyal believer in the greatness of the number…
Fitzy “Fitzy” Fitzy set his goal for the season at 11 goals, but quickly decided that 11 wasn’t nearly ambitious enough and is now aiming…
Shane “Shaner” Iralson is a key member of this year’s team, known for his ginger hair and the ever present AirPods in his ears. He…
Justin "Hutchinson" Hutchison is a long, smooth-skating defenseman whose passion prevents him from coming off the ice for a change. Justin is poised to be…
Jack (@backshotsbyjmitch) Whyte is an avid photographer and male model. After taking his celebrity lookalike of "Danny Noonan" much too literally, he has begun caddying…
Noah "Gummy Bear" Gumma is a big bad defenceman known for a tough upbringing in Birmingham. Gumma can be found at the bottom of tier…
Samuel “Fish Sticks” "Kam Sarp" Karp is known for his calm demeanor and reserved personality. As one of the most positive characters in the locker…
Tsimafei "Tim" Lazouski is probably the smartest person you will ever meet. He spends most of his time commuting from Narnia for his daily task…
Dante "Mungbean" Munger joined the nursing program to balance the gender disparity in the field. Unfortunately, Munger's focus has shifted off of hockey after he…
Will “Freakbob” Friedman is the president of this year’s team. He spends most of his time rewatching Monsters, Inc. to model his leadership style after…